Most people lock themselves out of a car or house at some point in their lives. However, it seems odd that there is an unofficial club of ‘stooges’ who lock themselves out of (only) cabins. Since most mistakes are born from carelessness rather than ineptitude, perhaps we should send these stooges on a redemptive quest to The Cabin In The Woods (Rotten Tomatoes Metacritic).

“Not since “Scream” has a horror movie subverted the expectations that accompany the genre to such wicked effect as The Cabin in the Woods, a sly, self-conscious twist on one of slasher films’ ugliest stepchildren: the coed campsite massacre.” Variety Peter Debruge

Other slasher stepchildren include: hillbilly nutjobs, lost hotties, and the haunted/cursed somethingorother.

“Charmingly, like a throwback to the pre-Twitter age, here’s a horror film that’s been made with no reasonable way to discuss it beforehand.” Time Out New York Joshua Rothkopf


“The Cabin in the Woods isn’t merely another “Scream” exercise in self-awareness, or a “Scary Movie” spoof of the same. It’s a wickedly smart hybrid mutation, biting the severed hand feeding the genre.” Tampa Bay Times Steve Persall

The Price of horror/comedy

“Is it scary? Not especially. But there are enough gory surprises around every bend to keep you laughing/screaming/cringing.” New York Magazine (Vulture) David Edelstein

I look forward to giggling/panicking/fleeing. Also, the hyper-hyphen and slash/segue are wonderfully flexible linguistic concoctions. I recommend using them if throwing grammar-get-together’s or if being slightly silly/sorta smartass.

“Look for it to thrill you, scare you and tickle you – all at the very same time. It’s a wild ride – hop aboard before someone spoils it for you.” Marshall Fine Hollywood & Fine

Spoiler alert! Actually, I don’t have a spoiler, but I wanted to test the emergency spoiler alert system. You passed the test because there was no way to fail. Essentially, all forms of losing were on Lockout (Rotten TomatoesMetacritic).

“Like a Luc Besson concept that was fleshed out by a high-school creative-writing class..all the suspense of air leaking from a balloon.” Marshall Fine Hollywood & Fine

If the movie was written by high-schoolers, should we assume the balloon is a whoopee cushion?

“Tackles a nifty futuristic premise with bargain-basement efficiency and a deadpan, devil-may-care attitude. It’s an initially invigorating tactic that proves slapdash and unsatisfying over the long haul, reducing a potentially rich sci-fier to the level of a halfway decent time-killer.” Variety Justin Chang

Surprisingly effective time-killer

“A putrid film that comes dead-weighted with hammy one-liners and a plot so silly it borders on comedy?” USA Today Scott Bowles

Criticism sounds less certain when it ends with a question mark?

“Who cares about subpar computer-generated work when Guy Pearce is a one-man cartoon badass spectacle all to himself?” Nick Schager Slant Magazine

Speaking of human cartoon spectacles, did you know they rebooted The Three Stooges (Rotten Tomatoes Metacritic)?

“It’s a concept that shouldn’t work at all. But – who’da thunk it? – it’s better than a hammer to the head.” Joe NeumaierNew York Daily News

That’s setting the bar so low you could hit your head on it.

“There is an appealing nyuk, nyuk nostalgic spirit to The Three Stooges. To fully appreciate this paean to slapstick and silly nonsense simply requires that cynicism be temporarily shelved and the thinking side of the brain shut down.” Los Angeles Times Betsy Sharkey

Maximum nyuk-nyuk can be achieved through lobotomization.

“The Three Stooges isn’t very funny, but it is, like last year’s far superior The Muppets, a sincere act of fandom on an epic scale.” Alison Willmore AV Club

By the Power of Fandom!

“Silly, harmless laughs–unless you’re some kinda wise guy, ay?” Matt Pais RedEye

King Sheep is some kinda wise ass