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Sound Bite Reviews:

Sherlock Holmes: Holmes uses Victorian kung fu and quips like a lover with Watson, but the plot puzzle is missing a few pieces and the end result leaves Holmes’ genius on the screen rather than in the audiences’ mind.

The Road: The dreary poetry of the novel is distilled into an impressive-looking and emotionally resonant journey, but, like the book, the joy is in the journey rather than a satisfying destination.

Up In The Air: Job loss serves as a topical premise with poignant commentary on modern business practice, but Clooney’s presence and his strong backup of actors might be the only aspects that stand the test of time.

Avatar: A familiar story gets an impressive update with incredible visuals (especially in 3D) and pulse quickening action courtesy of the master of thinking-man’s science fiction: James Cameron.

Twilight Saga - New Moon: The teenage soap opera adds a layer to its mythos, but the end result is the same teenage angst and hunky voyeurism of before with a ‘meh’ aftertaste.

Wall-E
by King Sheep


Hancock
by King Sheep


Get Smart
by Major Sheep


Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull
by Major Sheep


21
by King Sheep

There Will Be Blood
by King Sheep


No Country For Old Men
by King Sheep


Burnout: Paradise (PS3)
by King Sheep


Romance and Cigarettes
by King Sheep


Juno
by King Sheep


Charlie Wilson's War
by King Sheep


Enchanted
by King Sheep


National Treasure 2: Book of Secrets
by King Sheep


The Golden Compass
by King Sheep


Lair (PS3)
by King Sheep


Pain (PS3)
by King Sheep


The Assassination of Jesse James by the Coward Robert Ford
by King Sheep


Beowulf
by King Sheep

= Film Review = Game Review = Web Review = DVD Review
1408 by King Sheep
It seems strange to write this, but 1408 is a well-made, finely acted, suspense horror movie that achieves almost no scares. Sure, there are some creepy bits, some suspense, and a few "I hope I don't think about this the next time I stay in an old hotel room" moments, but overall it succeeds at being a clever and amusing distraction without getting into your head enough to cause nightmares.
300 by King Sheep
3:10 to Yuma by King Sheep
Director Mangold assembled an amazing cast and told 3/4 of a good story. I enjoyed it right up until the end, where all the gritty realism gave way to sentimentalism and plot improbabilities. Give it a try if you like watching Bale and Crowe or are a fan of the genre. Otherwise, I recommend taking a pass or waiting until video.
American Gangster by King Sheep
Bionic Woman by King Sheep
Blades of Glory by King Sheep
When it comes to comedies I only have one question: is it funny? The answer in this case is absolutely. It's not on the level of Anchorman or Talladega, but it's absurdist, culturally referential, and occasionally brilliant comedy gives you plenty of Lauggifaws (giggle + guffaw + laugh)'s. Perfect matinee.
Borat by King Sheep
Boys by King Sheep
The Bourne Ultimatum by King Sheep
Bourne movies are Bond movies without the cartoon influence. No gadgets or cool cars, hell even the romantic interest is gone. This is a spy movie where the spy is tougher and smarter than everyone trying to catch him, and it's a lot of fun to watch. Among all the trilogies this summer, this is the first happy ending.
Brothers Grimm by Hammurabi
Buffy The Vampire Slayer, Seasons 1-7 by King Sheep
Bully by King Sheep
Burnout: Takedown by King Sheep
Cars by King Sheep
Casino Royale by Major Sheep
Chicken Little by Major Sheep
Children of Men by King Sheep
The Chronicles of Narnia by Major Sheep
The Departed by King Sheep
District B13 by King Sheep
Disturbia by King Sheep
Half teen romance / half thriller. It succeeds at retelling this story in a fresh and exciting way. But it fails at being original or daring. It ain't bad but it will never be a classic.
eBaum's World by Harlow
Elizabethtown by Major Sheep
Eragon by Major Sheep
Fantastic Four: Rise of the Silver Surfer by King Sheep
I expected it to be complete shit and I ended up enjoying myself for a brisk 100 minutes. It boils down to being a superhero movie for moviegoers with low expectations, only some of it is painful and most of it is brainless fun.
Failure to Launch by Hammurabi
A terrific comedy with great secondary characters (the friends, the parents) and plenty of screwball laughs for a light-hearted night.
Fell: Feral City by King Sheep
Fracture by King Sheep
Sometimes Hollywood takes a great idea and makes a terrible movie. This film represents the opposite. It takes a decent idea and makes a damn fine flick. Great performances, high production quality, and strong cinematography overshadow the somewhat lackluster concept.
Ghost Rider by King Sheep
Nick Cage's overacting, Eva Mendes' chest and a spectrum of good to bad special effects are the highlights here. Plot inconsistencies, borderline pathetic dialogue/acting and that 'cheese' factor round out the con side. If you can limbo under your expectations, you might enjoy the ride.
Girls by King Sheep
One part science fiction, one part horror. Mix in some small town character relationships and a splash of 1950’s paranoia and you’ve got GIRLS, the multi-part Luna Brothers graphic novel. Once you start reading you’ll be immediately sucked in. Not all the characters are smart, but they are all well defined and interesting. I can’t wait to see how it ends.
God of War 2 by King Sheep
If you’ve played the first GOW, expect more blood, cool new weapons, and even more epic battles. If this is your first GOW, there’s uh...lots of blood and stuff. It’s more of the same and a great example of it ‘if ain’t broke don’t stop making sequels’. Plus, it is the last big event game for the PS2, so if you own one, go buy this game.
Grindhouse by King Sheep
Gun by King Sheep
Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix by King Sheep
It's a movie, not a book. And as a movie, especially one that is part of a series working towards a larger goal, Phoenix excels at deepening the dangers facing the wizarding world; most notably, Deloris Umbridge, who brings a vile smile and a cheery laugh to all her shady dealings. There are a few parts of the film that won't make much sense if you haven't read the books but it still holds together better than your average blockbuster. Plus, it features some wicked awesome wizarding duels that are worth the price of admission alone. As summer movie's go, its got substance and its got style.
The Heartbreak Kid by Major Sheep
A History of Violence by Major Sheep
A History of Violence by King Sheep
Incredible Hulk: Ultimate Destruction by King Sheep
Ice Age 2: Meltdown by Major Sheep
The Illustionist by Hammurabi
Magic and mystery surround the main character, Eisenheim, as he reunites with his lost love and taunts the reigning son of the Emperor in Vienna. Beautifully set and performed, you will love this movie or you're a fool.
Jesus Camp by King Sheep
I started this movie with an existing fear and curiosity about Evangelical Christians. After the movie, I feel the same. By doing away with a narrator, most of what you see is Evangelicals speaking for themselves regarding abortion, science and Bush. However, seeing kids speak in tongues and cry a lot did little to help me understand their faith. Ironically, it's hard to label this movie 'good' or 'bad' because when looking behind the curtain there is an expectation that what you see will be shocking. In this case, you being appalled or comforted depends on what you already think of Evangelicals.
Knocked Up by King Sheep
Funny, touching and believable. It provides the most smiles you'll get out of any movie this summer. Everyone who's seen it has either liked it or been drunk. So what are you waiting for?
King Kong by Major Sheep
King Kong: Official Movie Game by King Sheep
Kingdom Hearts II (Final Update) by Major Sheep
Kiss Kiss Bang Bang by Major Sheep
Little Miss Sunshine by King Sheep
Live Free or Die Hard by King Sheep
Despite becoming dangerously absurd down the home stretch, this one isthe first 'guaranteed good times at the movies' of the summer. Willis is in top form and surrounded by people who do their jobs exceptionally well (from verbal quips to impossible stunts). Sure it's crazy and loud, but its also stunning, playful and a hell of a lot of fun.
Loco Roco (PSP) by King Sheep
The Man With the Screaming Brain by King Sheep
Metal Gear Acid (PSP) by King Sheep
Miami Vice by King Sheep
Michael Clayton by King Sheep
This intelligent foray into the conscience of lawyers officially begins the Oscar race. The narrative patience that the film employs rarely tries to dazzle the audience and may prompt some viewers to check their watches, but the uneasy and conflicted tone of the film is a perfect match for the actions of its morally skewed protagonists. Unfortunately, this film shoulders the Hollywood curse of being 'great, but impossible to sell," and praise for subtlety seldom wins out in a Saturday matinee taste test.
Mission:Impossible 3 by King Sheep
The Mist by King Sheep
Monster House by King Sheep
No Reservations by Major Sheep
Feeding off of the "Foodie Frenzy" currently engulfing television and other parts of cinema (Ratatouille), this romantic dramedy has more than its share of heartfelt moments, a hefty helping of internal struggles, and garnished with a few laughs. My one complaint is that it takes no risks and has a predictable plot. Nevertheless, it's enjoyable, especially if you love food.
Nothing by King Sheep
Ocean's 13 by King Sheep
Thirteen was not unlucky this time around. It¹s got a little of a been there done that feeling, but the chemistry, characters and cool are still engaging and entertaining. So far, it¹s the front runner for best of the summer trilogies.
Open Season by Hammurabi
A well done movie, but it suffers from the "Men at Work" effect. The most enjoyable parts of the movie involve the set-up of the characters, and the resolution seemed a bit trite and underwhelming. Good for a couple laughs.
Over the Hedge by King Sheep
Pan's Labyrinth by King Sheep
Visually amazing and a truly grim fairy tale about a girl in Fascist Spain. Its strength is mood, characters, and that ‘wow’ factor. Some people may complain that they have to read subtitles. Jerks.
Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man's Chest by King Sheep
Pirates of the Caribbean: At World's End by Major Sheep
The Proposition by King Sheep
It’s a western, in Australia, that deals with the complexities of lawlessness at the edges of civilization. Gritty, raw and violent, you won’t see a better Western again for some time. If you like the genre, you owe it to yourself to see this one.
Psychonauts by King Sheep
Ratatouille by Major Sheep
By now, even the harshest skeptics should be desensitized to Pixar's movie premises. These guys make gold out of anything they get their mits on, and this cartoon is a perfect example. It's a classic journey of self-discovery with a hefty helping of fish-out-of-water. It goes without saying that Pixar has outdone themselves with their animation, but I must say that there are moments when you really feel emotion coming from the computer-generated characters. However, if ogling at digital wizardry isn't enough of a movie-going experience for you, there's still plenty of action, humor, and heart to make this film a winner, no matter your age.
Ratchet and Clank: Tools of Destruction (PS3) by King Sheep
Resident Evil 4 by King Sheep
Robot Chicken, Season 1 by King Sheep
If you have ADD, skip a dose of your meds and give this show a chance. Zany, bizarre, and loaded with cultural references, you’ll soon find yourself telling friends about a skit or segment that made you laugh. Check out Youtube for some previews.
Rocky Balboa by King Sheep
Serenity by Major Sheep
Shoot 'Em Up by King Sheep
I'd rather it be called 'five excuses to have a gunfight" but the current title works just as well. This one is hard to classify. It tries to pull a Scream and mock the conventions of its genre (two pistols minimum) while enjoying its tropes, but it only half works. While it may be deliberate to edit out characters and plot in favor of quips and bloody gun fights, that doesn't make it good. In the end, it's a two-hour diversion with a few laughs, but not much else.
Shrek the Third by King Sheep
It's more of the same and it doesn't improve on anything. Almost all the emotion has been stripped out of the story, but most of the gags still work. Fine matinee, but you'll enjoy the movie more if you expect it to be crap.
The Simpsons Movie by King Sheep
After 400+ episodes, here is the 90 minute movie that answers the question: has the Simpson's shtick gotten old? No. Refined is better word. It's still the show humor and perspective. There isn't much new, but for fans of the show, it's a good time and it doesn't disappoint.
Simpsons (All Systems) by King Sheep
Star Wars: Battlefront II by Major Sheep
Stardust by Major Sheep
Stardust has successfully become the whipped cream on my summer movie pie. Take a roll of fantasy dough, add a pinch of Princess Bride comedy, a dash of unexpected plot and character twists, a full cup of adventure and you're there. This movie returned me to the wide-eyed and inspired youth who watched The Neverending Story four times in a row one weekend. This film will rekindle even the faintest glimmer of fantasy in your heart, and I have no doubt Stardust will become a classic that will share the same shelf as the other two. My only complaints are that the beginning felt a little manhandled, and there was one glaring example of deus ex machina solving a plot issue. Go see it today.
Superbad by King Sheep
In my day, we had Dazed and Confused, my parents had American Graffiti, and for the YouTube generation, Superbad is their raunchy on-the-cusp-of-college comedy. Featuring a young crop of comedians destined for long careers, it balances absurd scenarios and crude humor while still staying consistent with its characters and audience. I'm not convinced it will be a classic for those who feel distant from high school and it's grossness with turn plenty of people away. However, it's dirty brand of comedy is good for a lot of laughs, even if some of it might make you feel bad afterwards.
Superman Returns by King Sheep
Superman Returns by Major Sheep
Surf's Up by King Sheep
So, check it out, it's an animated mockumentary about surfing penguins. Great voice work, pretty pictures and pleasant sounds round out the good. Wicked slow pacing drags the middle into badness. No ugly to speak of.
Talladega Nights: the Ballad of Ricky Bobby by King Sheep
TMNT by King Sheep
TMNT is a nifty recipe of nostalgia, animation and a Saturday Morning Cartoon plot. This means it still feels like a kids movie even though it's aimed at people in their 30's. Unless you're feeling sentimental for the entertainment of your youth, skip it.
Thank You for Smoking by King Sheep
Transformers by King Sheep
Big loud explosions, pretty cars, surprisingly good acting, wicked cool special effects, plot holes, hot chicks, confusing camera work, robots fighting, cartoon cheese, a few genuine laughs and the summer movie equivalent of a kitchen sink. The only question left to ask is do you like big loud explosions, pretty cars, surprisingly good acting, wicked cool special effects, etc?
Ultimates 2: Grand Theft America by King Sheep
Underworld: Evolution by Major Sheep
V for Vendetta by Major Sheep
The Warriors by King Sheep
Who Killed the Electric Car? by King Sheep
When was the last time you found a new reason to hate car companies? Well this documentary will give you a few more and raise some important questions about ‘new’ technologies (ie fuel cell, hybrid cars). Watch it with friends; you’ll want to talk about it after.
Wikipedia by Harlow
X-Men 3: the Last Stand by King Sheep
Zodiac by King Sheep