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Up on the Rig Again

by Major Sheep on September 4, 2008 at 6:12 am
Posted In: Uncategorized

The title. It sounds more poetic than “back in the saddle again.” Also not so overused.

I finished my four classes at Lake Washington Technical College last Friday, and you should all find it noteworthy that I achieved my first 4.0 quarter since grade school. Huzzah!

Two things stick with me about my time at LWTC. First, I feel like I wasted my money at Wazzu. Not my time. Those were some of the best times of my life and I don’t regret a single day in Pullman. But I blew a lot of money there on classes that I didn’t always pass.

Second, when I look at four 4.0s lined up in a nifty little column, it makes me realize just how smart I am when I’m interested in my studies. I think, “How could I have botched this up before? It’s so easy!” That’s age talking.

So here I sit with stylus in hand, busily working on my art.

It became clear to me in the last couple of months that I’ve gone about as far as I can go in the realm of cartooning. Not that I’m proclaiming myself a master, ready to start the Nate Taylor Center for Children Who Can’t Draw Good and Wanna Learn To Do Other Stuff Good Too.

Though if I did, you better believe that center would kick ass. There would be courses on Tai Chi, Beginning Romance, and Made-Up Games. All classrooms would be ball-crawls, too.

Anyway, I’m concentrating on painting now. Obviously. Just check out the front page for updates. I’ve got a ways to go, but practice makes perfect, donchaknow?

The hardest part of painting is the colors. Well, color and not having any definitive lines. Sure, I know the art world is big enough to allow for paintings with hard lines, but the coolest stuff is always devoid of linework. Like Frazetta and Brom and Dos Santos. That’s what I want to do.

Color theory is a whole problem by itself. I’m not color blind, but then again I’ve never really looked at the colors around me. If you were to ask me what color the leaves on a tree were, I’d say,

“Green.”
Ah, but what kind of green?
“Oh, a yellowish green I suppose.”
All of them?
“Well, no. There are some that have a bit of brown to them.”
What about the shadows on the leaves?
“Jeez, I don’t know. Dark green?”

That’s a snippet of my inner dialogue, by the way. I’ll go on like that for twenty minutes just staring at a tricycle and how the light bounces off the paint and the rubber. I’ve gotten more than a couple of awful glares from people in coffee shops who think I’m ogling them.

“No, I was just studying the way indoor light highlights your skin in yellow, and outdoor light makes it a desaturated blue!”

I know what a tetriadic color scheme is. That doesn’t help me pick what color to use for rocks. Painting is a completely different mental state from drawing. One highlight of all this fixation is that I’ve started dreaming in color.

Before, I didn’t necessarily dream in black-and-white, there just wasn’t any color. Strange, huh? At any rate, I’m going to be charting my progress, difficulties, and successes here as often as I can. Maybe this blog will actually have a benefit beyond stoking the fires of my own ego. Aghast!

So that’s all for now. I’ll leave you with a new vocabulary word.

Wupdate: noun, an amalgamation of “web” and “update” used to describe new content to a web page.

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Temporary Tyranny

by Major Sheep on August 14, 2008 at 1:43 am
Posted In: Uncategorized

Hello, all! In the next phase of my Plan for Employment, I’ve taken the index page for Ol’ King-sheep.com, and turned it into my own personal online portfolio. “But, Nate,” you moan lustily into my ear, “You already have a gallery of your artwork on the site.” A-ha! ‘Tis true, but there is a difference between a gallery and a portfolio.

A gallery — and I’m speaking of online galleries here, not stuffy marbled halls filled with pretentious paint daubs — is the equivalent of a shoebox you keep on your kitchen table where you throw everything you’ve done in the last ten years. It’s haphazard, cluttered, and entirely too full.

A portfolio, on the other hand, is the very creme de la creme of the gallery. It contains the artwork that you want to show people in order to impress them and get a job. Each piece should glow with enough artistic prowess to light an average-sized bedroom.

So that’s what I’ve turned the index page into. In fact, if you turn off the lights and go to that page now, the sheer brilliance should light your room. Go ahead. Try it.

With any luck, it will be just what someone is looking for in an employee. Cheers.

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Laughs for Wednesday

by Major Sheep on July 30, 2008 at 12:53 am
Posted In: Uncategorized

[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1gZ0x8AVaBI&hl=en&fs=1]

Love,
Nate

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The prince named after the sea

by King Sheep on July 24, 2008 at 11:38 pm
Posted In: Uncategorized

Prince Caspian
July 25-27
$1 admission
Audian Theater, Pullman WA

So there are a lot of 6’s involved with this movie: 66% positive reviews (106 out of 160) with an average rating of 6.3/10. I don’t bring this up to imply that there is a hellish numeric conspiracy haunting a Christian movie parable, rather…well I don’t have a rather. I guess I did mean to imply there was a demonic number conspiracy. Let’s see if there is any evidence to support my ridiculously unfounded observation.

“If anything, this sequel could have used more hellfire. You leave feeling covered in a blanket of bland.” Peter Travers Rolling Stone

Okay. Just to play devil’s advocate, adding a few flames of eternal damnation to any movie is likely to spice it up. All those 6’s are probably just coincidence.

“In steering the film closer to his own vision, director Adamson steers it away from C.S. Lewis’s, and so it loses some of the book’s core spiritual themes.” Peter T. Chattaway Christianity Today

“Much of what makes the first Narnia movie work is, literally, missing in action in the spiritless sequel.” John Wirt Advocate (Baton Rouge, LA)

So at best, this sequel substitutes spiritual themes for war and fighting. At worst, it has no soul.

Nothing suspicious in this photo


“If this is a movie for children than I can only guess the filmmakers had Donald Rumsfeld’s grandkids in mind when they made it.” Richard Knight Windy City Times

Okay. I assume that Mr. Knight is categorizing Rumsfeld as a war-mongering power-mad grandpa who puts his children to bed in Halliburton footies, but why would his grandkids be the target audience? What lessons does this film endorse?

“If there’s one genre of family film that’s my personal favorite, it’s the one featuring a sword-fight to the death.” Mark Ramsey MovieJuice!

Ah. So the wholesome message is that it’s okay to gore enemies with a cutlass even though you couldn’t take one to school or on a plane. Very Rumsfeldian. Let’s stay in this mode and read some nonsense.

“Puss in Boots, Gimli and Jesus Christ walk into a bar. The bartender, noticing how down they all look, asks what’s wrong…” Gina Carbone Seacoast Newspapers (NH/Maine)

I’ve got that weird feeling where I hear the set up for a joke, but not the punch line. Hopefully the movie isn’t the punch line. Hm.

Behold the sacred text from whence came yonder film


“Ben Barnes [Prince Caspian] looks lost, with a thick Mediterranean accent reminiscent of Mandy Patinkin’s avenging Spaniard from The Princess Bride: ‘My name is Inigo Montoya–you killed my father–prepare to die!’” Kimberly Gadette LivePDX

So what if the review has little to do with the movie, everyone loves Princess Bride quoting. And on that note, when I am asked if I take Sarah’s hand in marriage, I will resist the instinct to say ‘as you wish.’

Party.
Drink.
Jubilation.

I’m off to get married. Weeeee!

Don’t mess with the Jesus!

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Give me some of that dark perfection

by King Sheep on July 22, 2008 at 11:51 pm
Posted In: Uncategorized


The Dark Knight
$158,400,000 opening weekend gross

We’re going to play a little game here, but we’ll get to that in a minute. If you haven’t seen the Dark Knight yet, then you probably either don’t have the time or you have a ’standing in line’ phobia. With its ‘biggest opening weekend ever’ hype coupled with reviewer praisegasms everywhere you look, it’s easy to embrace the fears of guys like this:

“Good, but overrated.” Robert Roten Laramie Movie Scope

Even with reservations, any mention of ‘good’ guarantees that a few more twinkles have been added to the mountain of stars The Dark Knight has accumulated. However keeping your expectations in check is a struggle with any summer movie, especially when the you read reviews like this:

“Do not worry about going in with unrealistic expectations. Your expectations pale in comparison with what The Dark Knight is prepared to deliver.” Brandon Fibbs Colorado Springs Gazette

Bold claims abound. It sounds a little shystery doesn’t it? No expectation is too unrealistic! So, let’s test the limits of Bat-hype. I’ve chosen the most hyperbolific reviews I can find and slipped in a faux review of my own. See if you can pick out the one that I made up amidst the ocean of rabid adulation.

“I say this with a smile from ear to ear, there is too much of a good thing. The Dark Knight is the best adult superhero film of all time.” Jeff Bayer The Scorecard Review

Stylish!

“To call The Dark Knight brilliant is an phenomenal understatement. Its bar-raising impact on both crime and superhero movies will be felt for decades. If movies could heal diseases, this one cures cancer.” Ted Hogan Hogansays.com

“This is the kind of movie going experience that people tell their grand kids about.” Bill Clark FromTheBalcony

Diabolical!

“…in the world of movies based on comic book heroes, there are the new Batman films, and then there’s everything else.” Daniel M. Kimmel Worcester Telegram & Gazette

“Nolan and company did such an incredible job with this and tied up all the loose ends so well, that it’s hard to fathom what they could do and where they could go with a 3rd film. I sincerely hope there isn’t another Batman film. You can’t top perfection.” Michelle Alexandria Eclipse Magazine

Terrifying!

“So here it is: The best superhero movie ever. The Dark Knight deftly accomplishes all one could hope for, and then it surpasses it, and then it continues to surprise. The movie isn’t just a triumph, it is that rare pop-culture oddity: A masterpiece.” Christopher Smith Bangor Daily News

“I’m tired of the early Oscar talk too, but when you’re talking the best performance in years, if not decades, it’s worth talking about. The whole movie is worth the buzz. Christopher ‘Slowly Revealing Myself To Be God’ Nolan has done it again.” Gina Carbone Seacoast Newspapers

Oh God! It burns!

Post your answer in the comment section, but before we conclude that this is the greatest movie ever let’s temper our excitement a little by indulging a nay-sayer.

“Mixed with the flashes of absolute brilliance are long dead sections. The film left me more often bored than entertained. It’s a certain candidate for my list of this year’s most overrated movies.” Steve Rhodes Internet Reviews 229 Comments

Most reviews get a handful of responses, sometimes in double digits if they’ve said something brilliant or stupid. I included the link to the comments in case you were curious. The anonymous venom and anger speaks to some long-bottled geek anger. Oh, the sad frustration of people craving unanimousness and getting healthy debate. Tragic. But then again, there were people who didn’t like Wall-E too.

We mourn the
Pleasantly Dire Joker

Goodyear is the Batman’s bitch.

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