Gambling, hookers and a guy from that 70’s show

by on June 20, 2008 at 7:18 am
Posted In: Uncategorized

What Happens In Vegas
Audian Theater, Pullman WA
Admission $1
6:30pm 9:00pm

This week Pullmanites are treated to another ad for Sin City: What Happens In Vegas (6:30/9). While the reviews don’t make it look like a winner (28% positive), the men and women of the entertainment estate do provide us with a buffet of opinions and styles. First up, the critical linguist:

“During the screening, I tried to come up with as many synonyms for the word “excruciating” as I could.” Pete Vonder Haar Film Threat

Hopefully you came up with more than one. Next to him is the forgiving optimist:

“As far fetched as the idea of guy disgust as the ultimate aphrodisiac may seem, Cameron and Ashton as the designated lovebirds keep the kinky marriage shocks and surprises coming. Move over Knocked Up. A Sex And The Sin City Vegas jackpot.” Prairie Miller NewsBlaze

And the ying to his yang, the scary emo pessimist:

“Bland enough to make millions as culture edges closer to oblivion.” Ian Nathan Empire Magazine

Geez, someone get that guy a latte and some Prozac. Although be sure to moderate your doses of prescription mood stabilizers. You don’t want to end up so confused that you don’t know if you’re happy or sad, like this guy.

“Here’s a romantic comedy that is goofy, highly implausible, sometimes over the top, often in bad taste, and resolutely empty-headed. In short, it’s the best example of its genre to appear on the screen this year.” Philip Marchand Toronto Star

It’s not often you hear ‘implausible,’ ‘empty-headed,’ and ‘bad taste’ used as compliments. Too bad he didn’t use ‘excruciating.’ For FYI’s sake, what level of bad taste are we talking about? It’s PG-13 after all, so we shouldn’t have hairborne bodily fluids.

“For an idea of the level of wit, several gags are built around the name ‘Dick Banger’.” Lou Lumenick New York Post

Hehe. Okay, let’s finish with a straight-talking Abyss-drinking realist:

“Like many Vegas weddings, this mean-spirited “romantic comedy” only makes sense if you’re drunk.” Sean Means Salt Lake Tribune

Can do. See you Friday.


Pull Down = Jackpot!

Here’s the story in pictures:


We Win!


60/40?


“Screw it, let’s get hitched”


Pop Quiz: in which picture are they actually happy?


Here’s to you America!

Comments Off on Gambling, hookers and a guy from that 70’s show

Snack Crack

by on June 19, 2008 at 5:45 pm
Posted In: Uncategorized

A new junk food deserves your attention: Pringles Baked Wheat Stix.


I’ve bought 6 boxes in the last two weeks. I’ve force fed samples to friends and family. I’m blogging about them.

Yeah, they’re the shit.


Ahh, Giant Pringle Stick Monster!

Comments Off on Snack Crack

Updates Fantastic

by on June 18, 2008 at 9:24 pm
Posted In: Uncategorized

So here’s what’s been going on with me.

I’ve been unemployed for about 3-1/2 months now, which means I’m starting to lose some of the hard edge that years in the retail trenches gave me. I’m also reading “Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance,” which is a trip I can highly recommend already.

Most of my free time is being spent working on a side project with a friend; the advance from which is keeping my head above the financial red line. The rest of my free time is going towards the noble pursuit of digital painting, and also the ironing of my own personal style as preparation for my art career.

Lastly, and this requires a little explanation, I’m going back to school.

One of the perks of being a ward of the Employment Security Department is a thing called Worker Re-training which works with a few local community colleges. While I am unemployed, this program will cover all fees, tuition, and supply costs associated with one quarter’s worth of classes. This means I get to go to school for free.

Naturally, it’s not as simple as that. There are forms and orientation classes and qualifying periods and evaluations, but I’m through all of that and a mere three weeks from joining the scholastic ranks once again.

Things I will be learning: web design, Illustrator, and Maya.

This means you can expect some changes (again) to the site, but it also means that I’ll be infinitely more marketable as the kind of artist that companies can’t wait to snatch up and hurl big swollen bags of money at.

Laters.

Comments Off on Updates Fantastic

Come to Vegas: we steal your money, but sometimes you take it back

by on May 30, 2008 at 9:27 pm
Posted In: Uncategorized

21
Audian Theater, Pullman WA
Admission $1
6:20pm 9:00pm

This story of MIT card counters is gambler/David up against casino/Goliath. Much of the film plays like a 2 hour ad for Las Vegas, so with 32% positive reviews you should approach this movie with the same uneasy optimism of a free all-you-can-eat buffet. Let’s start practical. If you’ve ever played blackjack, you know it’s easy to lose; does this film show us how to use addition and subtraction to milk cash from casino teats?

“Manages to make the act of counting cards seem as exciting as this past winter’s Super Bowl — and as perilous as climbing Mount Everest with both eyes closed.” Matt Brunson Creative Loafing

The connection between the Super Bowl and Mount Everest highlights your creative loafing quite well. I’m sure you, like me, will only experience either because we have TV’s. Although I’d rather see this year’s Super Bowl played with everyone’s eyes closed (I think the patriots could have pulled that one out). Back to the movie.

Everybody wins!

“A pulse-poundingly high-spirited and extremely well-directed drama. If 21 is only one thing, it’s intoxicating.” Dustin Putman TheMovieBoy.com

You heard it here first. This film will get you drunk. So far it all sounds like good news, where’s the voice of the angry 68%?

“I probably should have given it a lower grade, but I really, really like watching Laurence Fishburne hurt people.” Rob Vaux Flipside Movie Emporium

Okay, they’re sadists. But most of us enjoyed seeing Morpheus kick ass, where’s the bad news?

Everybody loses!

“By the time the end credits roll around, you realize nothing’s actually been risked. It’s the gambling equivalent of Go Fish.” Ty Burr Boston Globe

So, it’s a low-risk gambling story with the possible side effect of getting you drunk for a dollar. I’m almost sold. I need one more reason to venture out to the Audian tonight (Friday 9pm) for some cheap entertainment.

“The students are so blandly written this never builds any suspense, though it probably has some value as an empowerment fantasy for debt-ridden collegians.” J. R. Jones Chicago Reader

Horary!

Please Deal Jacks

Here’s the book.

And this horrible memory came up in my search.

Comments Off on Come to Vegas: we steal your money, but sometimes you take it back